Insecurities in a relationship start from jealousy and controlling nature but it will create great damage in your relationship. Insecurity in a relationship can raise many health issues in an individual. Here we discuss some signs of rising insecurity in a relationship.
1. Fear of losing your mate
The first sign of feeling insecure is to feel a fear of losing your partner. The constant fear in a relationship will make you feel like you are worthless to your partner. You feel like you are not good to be in a relationship and your partner will leave you whether your partner loves you or not, but a constant fear grows in your heart.
In many cases, a couple seeks couple therapy because insecurity is very harmful to a relationship and a big reason for relationship failure. If you have no faith in your partner and feel insecure in your relationship then you should not leave together in a relationship because faith builds a strong relationship.
2. Consuming jealousy
There are various levels of jealousy in a relationship. Some factors are healthy if you are committed to your partner and do not want anyone’s interference in your relationship. This healthy jealousy can change insecurity if you will not change yourself. Here are some signs of jealousy:
- If you are spying over your mate.
- Constantly doing inquiry by asking questions to your partner for their day out.
- You behave negatively with your partner.
- You want to control the behaviour of your partner, like telling them to break a friendship with another person because you do not want them to be friends.
- Clinging with your partner.
- Doing silly things to make your partner jealous like making friends with some to make your partner insecure.
It is very difficult to overcome Jealousy and it can ruin your relationship. You need to overcome this insecurity as soon as possible to be able to maintain your relationship.
3. Demanding access to electronics
If either of the partners is demanding access to your account on social media it means that the other partner is doubting your truthfulness. But if there is honesty in your relationship then no one is having any secret in it. That also means here and there you are sharing your story and posts with other partners. Of Course not allowing you to handle your account but sometimes asking for the opinion or advice to save your healthy relationship.
One must understand that by checking private messages, posts, stories, following your partner on different social media platforms you may feel at peace but in this way you are spoiling your relationship. Know that one cannot change another partner’s actions by checking others, however by having a healthy talk one may make others understand the problem and come to the conclusion.
4. You constantly check social media
The next sign is that you are constantly checking your partner’s. Although you know the passwords of your partner’s email, still your insecurities cannot be quiet. If you are able to check the device of your partner but you feel obsessed and check the social media of your partner’s device. By doing all these things you will draw your relationship towards an ugly fight and dense insecurities. Social media is working as a poisonous medium to kill relationships. It is the main reason to raise doubts among couples and spoil their married life.
5. Being paranoid about your partner’s whereabouts
If you constantly question your partner about their whereabouts then it can be frustrating for both sides and it can spoil your relationship. The worst thing is to have faith in your partner even though you feel insecure. If you continuously have arguments with your partner for their whereabouts then you should remember that you have no sure proof to doubt your partner then stop these arguments and trust your partner. It is a sign of being insecure in the or about the relationship. Males have more tendency to have this type of behavior than females.
6. The need for constant reassurance
If you are constantly questioning your partner about “Am I attractive?”, “Do you love me?”, “Are you being faithful?”. These questions come out because of insecurities. If you continuously question your partner to seek reassurance then it means you are insecure with yourself.
Asking excessive questions to seek reassurance from your partner indicates that you are depressed because of attachment anxiety. Seeking reassurance from your partner is fair up to a limit to show you their affection towards you and to make you feel special but if you are seeking reassurance due to depression then you require counselling to love yourself as you are.
7. You do not like to be left by yourself
If you have insecurities about being left alone in your relationship and you are not talking about this openly to your partner then it can worsen your relationship. You should change yourself and avoid this type of thinking from your life because it can spoil your relationship as well as your health. You can take help through counselling or discussing your problem with family or friends. They can help you to be yourself and love yourself as you are.
8. You avoid confrontation
If you are feeling insecure in your relationship and not confronting your partner because of having the fear that your partner will leave you. Honesty in your relationship from both sides to continue a healthy relationship. You must have a healthy talk with your partner. If you constantly ask your partner about their whereabouts then it shows that you are feeling insecure in your relationship. You should try to develop faith in your relationship by making mutual goals for your future. You have overcome your insecurities.
7 Ways To Feel More Secure About Your Relationship
Overcoming the insecurities in the relationships is a battle that you have to fight alone. If you want to overcome the insecurity you have while being in the relationship then you must have control over your emotions. If you do not understand or know how to overcome the insecurity, then you can seek help from a therapist. They can guide you properly on how to overcome insecurities in your relationship. If you really want to work on your relationship and save it, then you have to be patient and trust your partner. Here are some other tips to overcome insecurities in a relationship that can help you
1. Stop Comparing Yourself To Other Couples
One must understand that everyone is unique in their own way. And it is a human tendency that some couples bitches for other couples but understand that we should not be doing this. This only leads to feeling superior. It is always good to be realistic and be yourself. Believe that you are a unique couple and see around what is happening. Understand each other’s feelings and priorities and make bold decisions. Be careful not to become overconfident.
2. Do Not Be Comparing Yourself To Others On Social Media
Do not compare your relationship with the relationships you see online. It is just like comparing yourself with fake couples shown on social media. You must remember that all things shown in social media are not real. A survey in 2014 shows that those couples who often use more social media have insecurities in their relationship.
3. Let Go Of The Little Things
If you have a habit to remember, all those memories that bother you such as your friends, family or partner telling you anything, you cling to those memories. This will bother you in a harmful manner and can become the cause of a lot of problems in your relationship. You have to remember that no one is perfect. If you forgive and forget all petty things in your relationship then you will feel more light and comfortable. It will help you to maintain a happy relationship with your partner.
4. Focus On The Positive
If you are having a good relationship with your partner then you have many reasons and amazing things about your partner and relationship which are the major reason for you to be in that relationship. If you just focus on those reasons that will definitely fill your life with love and happiness and make you feel more secure.
5. Talk As Soon As You Need To
Unspoken worries that can spoil your relationship. It will slowly toxic your relationship and raise insecurities in your life. If you are feeling depressed, angry or disagreeing with your relationship. You should talk about it immediately to avoid the situation getting worse. If you solve things immediately then it will make you have more confidence in your relationship.
6. Know When To Take Others Advice And When Not To
Your friends often suggest various things regarding your relationship and you are listening to them. It is not necessary that all suggestions are always perfect. Sometimes it seems so stupid to listen to those things that do not even matter in your life like your house is small, your partner’s earnings are low. You have to decide what you want to listen to and what to refuse. If you take all these things seriously then insecurities will arise in your relationship.
7. Touch Each Other
You cannot imagine that physical touch can do wonders to erase misunderstandings in a relationship. In research, it is found that most of the couples thought that touching each other is very important to build a strong relationship for good means. It is beneficial for health and for your secure relationship too.
Also Read: A guide towards building healthy relationship boundaries