Why do we feel troubled in letting go of the past? Why is it so difficult to move on from the experiences that have caused us suffering & pain?
For instance, take the tragic day of 9/11. Chances are that you can probably think about what you were doing or who you were with when you heard about the attack. Now, tell us: can you think the same as of today? Probably not!
Your memory is likely to be blurry when you think about such details. Well, that’s because we do not retain information that does not have any feelings attached to it.
Information, along with emotion, makes an indelible impression. That is why so many of our limiting beliefs are formed in childhood itself. However, this doesn’t explain why we refuse to let the past go & move on!
But don’t worry! We got your back!
Today we will discuss why we feel troubled in letting go of the past & how you can do it!
So, without further discussions, let’s get started!
Why Do I Feel Troubled In Letting Go Of The Past?
Many of us get stuck in the past because we are in constant need of certainty. Certainty is one of the six human needs & is fundamentally about survival.
We all need to feel confident that we can avoid pain & find some comfort in our lives. In addition, we also like to feel certain about what’s coming next in our lives. Well, this is when letting go of the past becomes extremely important because it implies stepping into the unknown.
It takes prowess to let go of what is familiar to us, even if it’s negative & be vulnerable enough to move on from past mistakes.
Another reason why it is so difficult to move on is our link of emotion with information. For instance, if a person has been emotionally hurt, they are bound to bring it up over & over again in the relationship. The partner might think that no matter how much effort they put into mending things, the other person continues punishing them for their previous transgressions.
But what is all this costing us? How can we loosen our grip so that we can move forward in a healthier & joyful way? Well, the answer lies in the next section!
Tips On Letting Go Of The Past
It is said that most of the time, you tend to experience your mind & not your life. Your beliefs create your world & your past isn’t your future unless you decide to live there.
You can do anything & everything you want, irrespective of your past.
Well, here are some tips on letting go of the past.
- Turn On Your Letting Go Of The Past Into A ‘Must’
The primary step is to acknowledge what is holding you back & think about why you must move on.
Ask yourself what exactly you are holding on to – a failed relationship? An argument with a friend or family member that you can’t get over? Or do you need to forgive someone in person or in your heart so that you can ultimately let go of anger & step into a peaceful state?
Once you have recognized why letting go of the past is challenging, look for reasons why you must immediately move beyond it. In addition, think about how your life & relationships will change once you move ahead from your suffering.
This is one of the most critical parts of the process, as it will help you stay committed to moving on, no matter how hard it is. As a result, this will offer you a clear sense of purpose to establish & accomplish your goals.
Remember that you will definitely face failures, setbacks, & challenges, but if you have a strong enough reason & a purpose that drives you, you will remain focused & dedicated.
- Condition Your Mind
The ultimate breakthrough in life happens by learning numerous strategies, developing an empowering story & ensuring that you are in the right state of mind to keep moving ahead.
To do this, you must condition your mind every single day. Sometimes, it might feel awkward, but you must continue to avoid negative self-talk & begin embracing empowering beliefs that lift you instead of dragging you down.
If you don’t take time to examine & change your habits, the flow of life will turn against you.
Irrespective of how smart or savvy you are, if you don’t condition your mind, then you give tacit approval to what is disillusioning, disempowering, & disenchanting.
Instead of focusing on letting go of the past, you’ll find yourself distracted by the thoughts that keep you rooted in negative patterns.
Thus, to avoid this, feed yourself with empowering thoughts, knowledge, & positivity. Moreover, surround yourself with people who matter to you. All this will help you condition your mind!
- Create Empowering Rituals
Letting go of the past isn’t easy at all. But empowering rituals can help you in this.
There’s a reason that the world’s most successful people have established daily routines, like healthy breakfast, meditation, exercises, etc. Well, it’s the small rituals you do every day that build momentum & lead to significant change.
Realize that everything that happened in the past has made you what you are today – a strong & powerful person who can bounce back from anything. After all, when you love yourself & your life, letting go of the past becomes easy!
- Work On Personal Growth
There is no better time to work on your personal growth than when you try to let things go.
Focusing on learning & improving is not only a distraction from negative thoughts but also empowering. So, take out time to prepare your personal growth plan: think about a successful career or the relationships you deserve.
Once you recognize the areas you wish to work on, identify the obstacles you are bound to come across & assemble the tools you need to succeed. You can even seek professional help if needed.
Well, journaling is another method that can help you. Pouring your thoughts on paper will help you identify what’s holding you back. Moreover, you can even practice gratitude, which will enable you to live in the moment instead of the past.
Thus, make this a routine to see the positive in everything. This will finally give you the perception to embrace what you have instead of thinking about what you don’t!
- Shift Your Focus
The pain & suffering caused in life can control the way you think & act. You might often think that your circumstances are because of some mysterious force, but it’s actually your own doing, i.e., the decisions you make for yourself.
Always remember that we have the ability to turn positives into negatives, failures into lessons, & setbacks into opportunities. The only thing to do is accept that you can only control your actions & decisions and shift your focus from people or events that aren’t in your control.
You must also know that you cannot take back an unhealthy relationship, but you can learn/ know how to let go of your past mistakes. Don’t forget that every day is a chance to start afresh. From the minute you wake up, you make choices. Thus, learning how to let go of the past means breaking the pattern & focusing on creating the life you want.
Stop Dwelling In The Past: It’s Time To Move On!
Embracing the art of letting go of the past liberates our spirits & paves the way for a successful & future. Releasing the weight of past regrets as well as grievances unshackles our souls, thus allowing us to savor the richness of the present moment.
Well, it’s not about erasing history but about forging a new path which is unburdened by the negativities & shadows of the past. By forgiving ourselves, we unearth the magic of inner peace & open ourselves to innumerable possibilities that lie ahead. Thus, letting go of the past is the ultimate act of self-improvement, self-empowerment, & transforming our lives into the masterpiece of growth & resilience!